The Identity Shift of Motherhood

Motherhood has a way of turning your whole world upside down not just your schedule, but your very sense of who you are.

For some of us, it feels like grieving a past life. Maybe you once thrived in a fast-paced career, late nights out, spontaneous weekends. Suddenly, life slows into naps, snack breaks, and endless “just a minute” moments.

For others, it’s the opposite: motherhood speeds everything up. An introvert might find herself suddenly surrounded by playgroups, playground small talk, and outings she never would have imagined doing before.

But no matter which side you land on, there are moments we all share.

That split-second when you’re staring at the lounge room with the block tower knocked over, the cereal scattered across the floor, the wails of a tantrum ringing through the air and it hits you:

Oh. I’m the parent here. I’m the one who has to sort this out.

Sometimes, you miss the days of non-responsibility. The freedom to choose how your time was spent, without factoring in naps, snacks or bedtime stories.

But motherhood also opens a new door.

It asks you to stop and really think, “What do I want from life? How do I want to spend my time? What truly matters to me now?”

For me, it’s made me question the 9 to 5 grind. It’s pushed me to find creative ways to spend more moments with my child, to dream up a life that feels fuller, richer, more intentional. And yes, I long for days off. I crave moments to clear my head. That doesn’t make me a bad mum; it makes me human.

If anything, I’m more locked in now. More determined. I want to raise this little person to be amazing and to do that, I’ve stepped into things I never thought I’d do. I’ve connected with people I never would have met. I’ve left the house and made the effort.

Motherhood changes you. It shifts your pace, rewrites your priorities, and sometimes flips your personality on its head.

But it also expands your life in unexpected, beautiful ways and in the middle of trenches, you just might discover a version of yourself you never knew existed.

✨ If you’re in Ipswich, join our Thriving New Mums series at Queens Park Café. We chat about all of these real, honest topics from identity shifts to the messy, beautiful parts of parenting, over coffee, good company, and plenty of laughs.

Thriving New Mums at Queen’s Park Cafe the series designed for mums of 0 - 6 month olds